Besides Mark six main squeezes he has the option of going on ten different dates. Exactly ten bonus dates... It was screaming for a top 10, let's be honest. Ranging from no strings attached one night stands to maybe the beginning of something more, these dates are all very different in content and structure. Let's get to it:

Also, if you take a quick look at my username you'll be able to guess who won first place.

10 - Tommy

Orlin prosecutor starts our list at number ten. Don’t get me wrong, Tommy is a nice guy. But the problem is he isn’t much aside from that. Who is Tommy aside from tall, nice and well hung? No idea.

The most memorable part of his date doesn’t even come from him, but from the unhinged, vengeful driver Darryl. There’s just no way for Tommy to keep up with the competition, he is just a little too forgettable.

9 - Frank

If Tommy is forgettable, Frank falls into the the trap of being remembered for a bad thing. The stripper-attempting-to-pass-for-a-millionaire starts the date leaving a bad impression that doesn’t really dissolve after the reveal.

Telling little white lies to impress someone on the first date is something but pretending you’re a completely different person is a whole other thing. It becomes even worse when the lies don't do their intended purpose and come across as bragging instead. Depending on the player’s mood it might feel more satisfying to just leave the date than to be this liar’s first bottom.

8 - Cesar


This hard-ass cop is perhaps a little too into his job. His date is short and fun, if not especially deep. Cesar's date has a very porn fell to it, like Jesse & Hugh's. It seems like it was ripped out of a zany 80 porn movie. That you can even give him a pornstache is the cherry on top. A fun, light date.

7 - Jake


Jake’s date is one that's half porn and half actual date, and it fails somewhat because of it. The highlight of the date is, of course, the unexpected foursome with the firefighters. The problem is we barely know Jake and them two more guys show up and join the fun. The scene ends up being not as involving as it could have been if we knew all the characters.

After the date is over, it’s the foursome scene stays with player, not the hipster with pink hair. We finish the date amazed by what happened and not really caring about Jake.

6 - Jesse & Hugh


Jesse & Hugh, Cesar, the two firefighters in Jake's date, Tommy... What is it about Orlin's public servants that make them so horny? This is another date that feels porny, except this one is the best of the bunch. The date starts out hilariously with Mark getting high on weed(!), blacking out from it(!!) and inserting poor Slurpy where the sun doesn't shine(!!!). There's also the fact that Mark is, you know, having sex with twins. This date is a riot from beginning to end.

Also this date has a very creative use of sprites. The twins have sprites of their busts as they look down on a Mark...


...and instead of cutting to a text box describing the sex scene on a dark background, the sprites move during normal gameplay to compose the sex scene.


A pity they are the very last date. Imagine if the game used this trick from the start.

5 - Luke

The hot athlete not named Brad. Poor innocent Luke was lonely and was only looking for a bro to spend time with. Can anyone blame him when the app is literally named Brofinder?

Luke's date is one that feels like a date. The boys talk and get to know each other, Mark learns about his Irish immigrant background, that he plays Rugby and has a terrible taste in movies. And thanks to that little misunderstanding Mark can't come on too strong or Luke will leave, again like an actual date. The only weak part of the date is the sex scene.

4 - Oz & Pete

This date is two for the price of one. Two different characters. two different fetishes, two different paths, two different endings. Unlike Jake's date, the sex scene on this date works because we spend time getting to know all the participants.

The only flaw on this date, and it's a rather tiny one, is that Mark never quite becomes more than a third wheel. It's all about making one member of the couple realize his dream, and Mark is just sort of a happy trooper that goes along with it.

Still this is a fun, complex, honest date with surprisingly real characters.

3 - Donovan

Sweet, awkward Donovan. He is perhaps the least threatening of all the dates. There are no creepy vibes about him. Right from the start the date makes a point to defuse the "Sugar daddy looking for college age 'son' to feel #young again" implications that plagued Amos' route.

Donovan's is another date that feels like a date. You have an awkward text conversation, dance in club... do datey things, you know. And more importantly Mark gets to know Donovan. He gets to know the loving father he is, the skilled construction worker, the late life gay divorcee. Mark gets the whole picture of who Donovan is in a short date, something a only a few others dates manage to do.

And, really? It was time someone took a stance against "daddy" being a sexual compliment.

2 - Theo

Theo's date takes a hold of the second place. His date is unique in a number of ways. First it doesn't start as a date, but with Mark being paid to pretend he is Theo's boyfriend at a high school reunion party.

It's also unique that the two directions Mark can take are both satisfying. Want to help someone who has been bullied in enacting revenge? You can do that. Want to purposely say outrageous things? You can do that. And, arguably, that leads to the best outcome. Ian would be proud. Theo's character reveals itself slowly during the date; first he appears like the very model of a calm and elegant gentleman, then we learn he is a very wealthy game developer, then we learn about how petty he actually is, then of how his high school years sucked and shaped his outlook on people.

1 - Terrence

This is it, the best date in the game. First Mark contacts someone on Brofinder who stresses how important privacy is. Okay, the guy might still be in closet. Understandable. But then he really insists on privacy and gives Mark a list of instructions to follow so they can meet up. Okay, creepy.

Mark follows Terry's instructions anyway, cause he has a poor sense of judgment, and finds out that PLOT TWIST his date is a famous popstar. Then on out the fun starts. Terrence's date feels like an actual date. Him and Mark have dinner out, go to a bar, sing at karaoke. The boys do fun, datey things together.

Terry's date is also unique in that not only Mark gets to know him as a person, but get to experience how his day-to-day life is. He experiences a little of Terry's fame and all the stalkers, screaming fans and lack of privacy that includes. And all in only one short date too.

Terrence is such a well-delineated character that he endears himself to the player quickly and it feels very rewarding to offer reassurance and help him cut loose, only if for a night.

...also his self-sucking sex scene is ultra hot.


Terry has the best date in Coming Out On Top!

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